Peter Rhodes on stealing electricity, curious coconuts and three people who saved the planet

As energy prices soar, some crooks will doubtless try to by-pass their meters to steal electricity. I have discovered a number of online tips on how to do it, including one which tells us: “Assuming you don’t electrocute yourself and/or burn your house down, you’ll end up in jail, where you’ll not only get free electricity, but free food and housing, too.” Full marks for pragmatism.

In October 1990, with the Russian economy imploding under the rule of Mikhail Gorbachev, who died last week, I was dispatched to Moscow to report on the civil turmoil. A memorable interview came one night at Red Square when a man burst out of the shadows and tried to sell me a watch. Turned out he was a doctor who, having trained for six years, made more money flogging dodgy watches in an underpass than he could earn on his state-fixed medical salary. How did he feel about Gorbachev? “Huh!” He grimaced. “Three years ago we believed everything Gorbachev told us. Today, we believe no-one. Very bad times coming for sure. You tell them how it is.”

I bet Russia's “bad times” turned out worse than even he imagined. But at least the Cold War never turned hot and for that we should give thanks for three towering figures in history.

In this column in April 2013, I wrote this about the end of the Cold War: “For 40 years we lived in constant fear of nuclear annihilation. Mikhail Gorbachev, Margaret Thatcher and Ronald Reagan put their heads together, and put an end to all that. Overnight, quite miraculously, the terror endured by millions was replaced by goodwill. By rights, we should go down on our knees every day and give thanks. Instead, we forget and move on and grumble about the price of gas.” That's from nine years ago - and all done without a crystal ball.

Further to my piece on mis-hearings, a reader reports someone in a food shop asking for “dislocated coconut.”